Thursday, August 25, 2005

This was written Thursday August 25, 2005 at work and then emailed to myself at home to be later posted here.
It has been chaos here at work. We are short 2 CSR's and so extremely busy in the store, especially at night. It is hectic and crazy, complete chaos-we have had nothing but escalated customers-since the company changed the early upgrade policy-everyone is escalated. If we tell the customers, "no" -they want to talk to the M-store manager or DM-district manager. I give out their names and personal mobile numbers if the customers ask. My feeling is I do not make policy, I enforce it, if the M or DM allow customers to have stuff outside of policy that's fine with me. Well, DM was at our Wednesday Morning Meeting and he was talking about the rise in escalated customers and how we just need to smile more and approach customers with a more positive attitude. I like the DM, a lot, he is a genuinely nice guy, but I do not think he realizes how much we take from customers on a daily basis. Nor does he appreciate how day after day of this can wear you out and wear you down. It is easy to say, "be pleasant" and "have a positive attitude" when you rarely have escalated customers talking to you, much less screaming and cursing in your face. I had no idea people could be so horrible until I started working here. On the one hand I am VERY grateful to have a job. There are many who can not say that in this economy. I make decent even good money and have good benefits. My job is easy on the surface, who would have ever realized just how degrading it can be dealing with public. It is not as though this is my first time doing such. I delivered pizzas and worked in fast food all through college-I thought it could not really get any worse than that. HA!!!! Who would have ever thought that customer service for a reputable cell phone company could ever be this difficult. I can appreciate what it feels like to have a company you are paying your hard earned dollars ignore you. I feel that with SBC, DTE, Consumers Energy and Comcast Cable-but I have NEVER acted like my customers do. I have got to find another job.
JE and JA still owe me the $100.00 they borrowed from me 6/10/05 and were supposed to return to me on 6/15/05 or by my vacation at the latest. I finally told JA what was going on. He shared with me how JE is spiraling in his depression and still refusing to deal with it. It seems like JE has been getting worse since he got caught this spring, then the gas got turned off because he had not paid the bill in months-though he told me that the furnace broke, JA shared with me that it was really that he had not been paying it. I know he was been missing work when he was depressed and I think it continued even after that. He told me himself that he had received a verbal warning for attendance and I believe that was within his first 6 months with the company. I also know he has missed more time since then-often weekends. He quit taking the medicine, quit going to therapy and now is just continuing to engage in self-destructive behavior. The last time I talked to JA he told me that JE had not been paying the mortgage-and the house went into foreclosure and they had to refinance to keep it-he did not say how bad it was, but he did say that they had to get a lawyer. I know JE is supposed to handle the bills, but after the gas got cutt off I would have taken over managing them myself. JA promised to give me back the money 2 weeks ago, JE called when we got paid on the 15th-I was supposed to go to Ferndale to see CL's new baby and was going to meet JE for lunch and get the money then but I ended up not going. Either way, here it is the 25th and I STILL have not been paid and I am so broke it is unbelievable. If they truly did not have the money I would be ok with it, not happy about it but we are friends-or were-and I would let something like that go. I mean they have saved my ass time and again with A, picking her up from school or after school activities and dropping her off or taking her to places. It made it much easier on me as a working mom. If I had it I would just give it to them and much more. What irritates me is that F had asked me to borrow money and I had told them both how guilty I felt telling her no, but that my vacation was coming up and I did not want to be broke for it. JE promised to give it back in time. Then he and JA went on vacation, both got tattoos, went up north for part of the week to visit friends, etc. Then, all of a sudden, JE would not return my calls. He ignored me my whole vacation-my calls, my text messages, my voicemails. Unbelievable. You would think as a friend he would at least call and say "hey, I do not have your money like I promised, I know you are angry, but I am sorry." Finally, in desperation, after months like this, I told JA thinking at least I would get my money back before school started for A. HA! Now, neither of them are answering or returning my calls. In a way I miss them-we used to be very close. In another way I am really angry because here I am a single mom, not getting child support, struggling financially, and they owe me $100.00 and are planning another vacation the first week in September and I STILL have not been paid. I think this will/has kill our friendship-pretty much which makes me sad. At the same time I am so pissed. They owe me money and while I have never been mean or rude to either of them about, they feel free to ignore me. How ironic.
My friend CL had her baby boy, L. I forgot how small and fragile new babies are. He is unbelievably sweet, but she is exhausted. Plus, a lot of her life is hanging on a hope and a dream. She is in one of life's ultra stressful holding patterns. I hate them myself. Transitions in your life where you are a nervous wreck, but everything turns out ok in the end, at the time it seems it will never work for everyone involved. I have lived and experienced enough to know that in most situations things turn out ok, pretty much no matter what it is-or how you wanted the situation to go. I am sure that will happen with her, but yikes the meantime can suck. She has excellent job prospects, but no actual job-which is ok since the baby is so tiny-but still I am sure her mind would rest easier if she already had something lined up. The neighborhood she lives in does not have enough kids for the oldest to play with and her landlord is an asshole-so she needs to move. The baby's sperm donor (J is his real dad) does not even have a job or a drivers license-so his ability to help is nil. So, the stress is fairly heavy right now. BUT!!!!!! she is living with a really nice guy-J-who is 23, and without a doubt the best guy she has never dated hands down. Further more, he is employed, intelligent, kind, likes the kids, likes her and does not have another girlfriend somewhere she is sharing him with. She is happier than I have ever seen her-she shines-from the inside out and looks radiant. The happiness is evident in everything she says and does-I have never seen her happy and pregnant-but she was and for the first time I can think of someone other than her mom was there when L was born. I think his birth will forge a bond between the two of them. She is always stressed about money and she should not be-between her child support and J she should be ok. She said to me that loving him has made her a better person and I truly believe that even if it does not work she will make better choices in partners forever. Now that she has seen how it can and should be I do not think she will ever choose to put up with the bullshit again. I think it will work, stranger shit has happened. Look at N and D-I did not know them when they got together-but if I had, I would have thought it would never in a million years work. They have been together 8 or 9 years now and seem to be a truly happy married couple-if not giddy with happiness and romance-certainly more than content and very stable. They give me hope for both CL and myself.

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